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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My Life: A Pictoblog

How do you keep em on their toes?  You keep them reading.

Doctor filled out my medical marihuana papers for the state of Michigan the other day.  On the back of the paper he put a script:


10 puff - P.R.N. for pain in the gludious maximus.

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Had a nice talk with a friend recently.  He equates breaking up "alah koolaid" syle like being thrown under a bus.





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Nice analogy I tell him.  I can only imagine my flambouyant shrink a hot mess over my break-up. 

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"Oh you pretty chubby mustachiod man, Dr Robert has missed you, I've been looking for a new house boy.  You know those little Asain house bitches just cant get it right."

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No happy ending here either!


"Let's go ahead and get ready for a trial" the lawyer tells me.  "Where the hell have you been, I've been prepared for 8 years."  I tell my man, my ace boon coon.  I'm tired of these games and tasting government cheese, I want my chedda bitches.


manscaping

I talked to another friend a couple days ago about a judge I once wrote about on myspace when I had an account.  Cliff Taylor was called the sleeping judge who sat on the Supreme court here in Michigan.  The man was sleeping while on the throne, hearing some major cases.  This man could've ultimately heard my case and I wasn't taking any chance at that.  His mind was already made in some cases.  He sided with big business. 

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Not a friend to me, the working man.  Right around elections in I believe for 2008, I started putting the word out on the sleeping judge, I wrote a blog called "Nazi's and Real Life Nazi's."  I got the word out, people began noticing his name on the ballet.  An incumbant was pushed out of his "good old boy" seat. 

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So with that being said, I know you're listening.
I have my tinfoil hat on so you cant steal my thoughts! We can work with a calendar, I work better with my words.



I met this really hot chick recently.  I had only seen her in pictures until a few weeks ago. 

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She likes the mustache.   So next time I see her I am going to really do up the manscaping for her.  Do you think she'll get it before Valentines?  Or should I wait?


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Maybe I've been locked away from the dating scene for too long.  Women probably don't go for that.  I'm like a caged animal all the ladies say to me "you never get dis la la la la la!"

But if you get a little monkey oil in ya, you can pull off all the manscaping and mustaches you can think of.  It works every time.

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But after a 45 or 45......


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You get the picutre!

9 comments:

  1. Guess I need to comment, since I got here via special invite and all...seems like life keeps you on your toes, and you handle it with style!

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  2. This is the Mike i miss. Hilarious and yet thought provoking. You gotta go back to your blogging. It is a strong forte for you.

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  3. And here I was afraid your skyllz as a dry wit magician might have dulled somewhat. Nope. Sardonicism lives!

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  4. this is one blog i actually enjoyed. keep up the great work :-)

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  5. Vanna...yes it does keep me on my toes. Thanks for stopping by!

    MTRG...I've been keeping a lot of journals lately, still writing no doubt. I will try to work more of these into the mix, I miss the days of Myspace...

    Brittni...I know I was on a drought for a while, sometimes real-life gets me down in the crapper, have to find a release. ;-)

    Thanks Brian!

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  6. Your Blogs are off the fucking chain.. Never a dull moment and they always make me smile.. Keep writing.. I need these blogs! xo

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  7. I'm tired of being a caged animal....

    Trying to get my swerve back on!

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